Another set back

I thought I was just going in to get a script for Provera and was going to try to talk to her about doing a Clomid cycle but she had other plans.

We start to chat and she asked me how I was feeling and how I was doing after surgery. She told me that she followed my case and talked to my neuro a few times and she thought he was wonderful, I said I felt the same way.   I told her I was feeling well and most all of the issues that happened after surgery were gone.  The headaches were starting to go away and the I was starting to go back to my normal day-to-day routine.  She was happy to hear that and she wanted to talk about a plan for moving forward.

She asked me when my last period was and of course I told her and she was a little concerned that I haven't had one since surgery.  We started to talk a little more and she said well I want to run the entire set of labs again and see what's going on after surgery and if my Pit Gland was working.

She also wanted to do an ultrasound and check my lining to see how thick it was and how my ovaries looked. After about 40 minutes in the room with her a med student and the dildo cam she said everything looked great.  She was a little surprised that my lining wasn't thick at all which was something she wasn't expecting to see she said it should be somewhere between 8mm-10mm (1cm) but it was only 6mm.  She doesn't want to do Provera right now she thinks we should wait because the lining was thin.

So I get dressed and she leaves to go review a few things. This is when it all went down hill...and fast.  She comes back and explains to me that after looking at the last set of blood work, my ovaries and my ute Clomid might not be an option for me, because what the Clomid does is it tricks your brain to produce estrogen and FSH to create a folice and make me ovulate, but there's a good possibility if the Pit isn't working after surgery the Clomid won't do what it's supposed to.  She also thinks the only real option might be is injectables and an IUI.

Right now to say I hate my brain is an understatement.  I hate the fact that I will never ovulate on my own and even after all that I've been through I may still never get the one thing that I want in life the most.  I cried most of the day was pretty weepy about the whole situation but the RE is still confident somehow someway I will get pregnant.